Truth Be Told

my life, thru my eyes

Sunday, October 03, 2004

10-3-04 | ru serious?!

jus thought i should let some stuff out

ru serious?! ru serious?! i jus realised that i need to start pullin away slowly cuz im too attached to this girl and she has a bf. a bf with a muzzle so strong that she cant even say hi to me. a bf with a muzzle so strong that the only sensible thing she has said to me since yesterday is "we'll talk later" and i knew that was untrue the moment i hrd it. i jus wanted to be reasonable. she said that when i tried to talk to her yesterday.


the only thing that makes me feel sad is that i want to know what shes thinkin but she cant even find the time or remember me enuff to write it out. even when she did write it out, it got erased (like i havent been there b4 or something) and she couldnt be bothered to write anything again. i jus wanted to know somethin. that is jus sooo enlightening - i realised that, as always, i appreciate someone more than they appreciate me and i think about them more also. how many times have my posts been erased? MANY TIMES! i never used it as an excuse cuz it sounded lame to me...apparently im alone on that. i used to think it was important to share my reasoning so i would go back and salvage my thoughts. if she cant be bothered to let me in, then she shouldnt come near my writing.

she doesnt even know me! i cant count the number of times she has told me "im not most girls"...shes actin like most girls so i dont see where that statement comes in...

SHE DOESNT EVEN KNOW ME! how can u tell me that "we'll talk later" and then the next thing u have to say to me is "du know how to get to the mall?"

i could make a whole post on that one...

ive told her b4 that i hate such random questions and leave them unanswered. what do i mean by random? i mean questions that r the only thing someone has to say to u...questions like "can u give me a ride to...? or "du know when...?" questions by ppl who cant even say hi to u or have a convo with u. they jus make noise when they need somethin. of course i didnt answer that. let me give some insight on the way my mind works since someone whos supposed to be close to me doesnt get it.

if u dont feel it important to say jus a few friendly words to me or jus a have a little chat that let me know that we're cool, then naturally, i wont feel it important to answer some random question...

okay. i let it out.

i dont care if im right or wrong. i jus had to write. in my mind we're still cool, but i cant be understanding if theres nothin to understand - i can be 4givin tho so i wont hold anything against anybody.

jus have to let it out.

*song of the day: easy by lionel richie*


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